For many, growing pains usually hit around middle school to high school... however for 'Little Miss I Have it Together' reality and relentless sinking into my own skin hit a little later in life: COLLEGE.
Never before have I wanted to crawl into a huge hole to hide my wavering (lack-there-of) talent and unpleasantly toned body than when I ran track and cross country in college. I was and still am convinced that the sport I competed in during high school and the sport I waddled through in college, though described using the same words, were completely and entirely different. It was like sliding into the major leagues immediately after a year of T-Ball: an uphill and almost defeating climb to the top.
So as to not misrepresent my credibility/story telling abilities, I was a HORRIBLE runner my Freshman year compared to the 'OBU stallions'. Having come from a small Christian High School where I was one of the prizes to barely deserving the water girl responsibilities was a lot for a strong-willed and expectant girl to handle.
The self elected 'leader' of the team consisted of a rock-abed, light as a feather, doe-running, lengthy thighed, 2% body fat, pointy nosed, 1000% over dedicated, 'I'll pass on the ice cream thank you' senior girl, we'll call Nicki: whoops, is this her real name?! Her thriving intimidation was oddly admired by some but deeply scaring/resented by many quiet on-lookers. Her judgemental and territorial presence trickled down and slammed everyone into their constraining positions on the team.
I would love to say that things swung my way after charging onto the track screaming and tearing ol' Nicki to pieces, but nothing of the sort ever happened. Apparently this was my dose, or over-dose of humility sent straight from above. I gradually choked it down and emerged a bruised but stronger person. As the years crept by, I got stronger, more determined, Nicki graduated.... with several metals and broken records but no friends by her side, I finally got to stand on the platform of satisfaction.
Oh, the riches I have learned from those 4 years! If the wind is just right, exact smells come my way, waves of light a graze across me it brings me back to those painful, growing, renewing days of running through the beautiful country roads with my girls. I simply realized my goals for being on that team were so drastically different from the 'Nickis' in life: to impact lives was far more important than blasting the records or winning every race.
Well, gotta run!
